Easter in Nepal

Easter in my city of Toowoomba is, in a word, lively. The main feature is Easterfest, the yearly festival, which is filled with international musicians, loads of food and a vibrant community that takes the city by storm. Around 20 000 people from all over come to the event and it’s a great time to spend with friends and family. The Easter Sunday church service at my church is one of my yearly highlights, with 1500 people packing in to our auditorium to sing of Christ’s resurrection. It’s a beautiful time. And each year, my Mum sings a Robin Mark classic, ‘The Wonder of Your Cross’, at the top of her lungs, especially on Sunday morning. Easter, for me and for Christians all over the world, is a time of celebration, reflection and community.

And this year I spent it in Nepal.

It’s not the first time I’ve spent an important seasonal time away from my family and friends – the first time I came to Nepal I spent Christmas Day in Brisbane International Airport awaiting my flight.

But Easter this time round was particularly difficult for me.

I missed my family greatly. I missed catching up with friends in the marquees at Queens Park. I missed belting out my favourite worship songs surrounded by my church family. These short sentences do not capture the extent of the pangs of loneliness I’ve felt at this time, but I assure you, I ache for Australia sometimes and I really do struggle to keep going and stay positive sometimes. I anticipated that loneliness would be part of this journey, and that Easter away from home would be hard. But frankly, not this hard.

Easter in Nepal has been special in its own way, however. Good Friday was spent in reflection and singing songs to Jesus. Saturday involved sharing and singing at Nepali church in the morning (which lasted around 4 hours), followed by a second service and fellowship time from 8pm til 1:30am! It was a lot of fun – there was food, dancing, messages, lots of singing. Then I woke up at 6:00am to participate in a ‘rally’ this morning, where thousands of Nepali Christians walk and dance through the streets of Kathmandu for several hours before arriving in a central park for a service. It was incredible.

After seeing a glimpse of the church service, I caught a bus to English church, where I got to lift praises to Jesus in my mother tongue. After walking around for a while, I came home and crashed on my bed, welcoming sleep after several hours on my feet. While I still miss my family and community back home, my Nepali Easter rocked.

This year what stood out about the Easter story was how Christ’s resurrection and overcoming of the grave allows and empowers us to also overcome the darkness of this world, and take off the chains this life uses to enslave us: Money. Worry. Body image. Business. Pride. Loneliness. These chains are logical, seductive, potent and deceitful. And they are sometimes so much a part of us that they hurt to take off. But Christ has died and risen so that we can be free from the slavery of this world.

So are you listening Loneliness? Your chains are coming off me right now, in the name of Jesus. And Lord, Loneliness makes sense to me and it’s familiar, so I may put it back on in the future, but can you please help me now and forever to trust you and let your overcoming power rule the dark forces that try to pull me down.

Amen!

 ‘When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: “Death has been swallowed up in victory.”
“Where, O death, is your victory?
  Where, O death, is your sting?”’
1 CORINTHIANS 15:54, 55

STORY TIME: Rodent Revelry

Yesterday I went on a house visit. I love the opportunity house visits present to share and eat with other believers. And it’s cool to see that after a family has been encouraged during a visit, they are way more likely to be at church the following Sunday. Fellowship works!

Anyway, with Nepal being a developing country, it’s been a given that I’ve seen houses that are considerably smaller than the ones found in Australia. Sometimes one or two rooms will shelter entire families. I don’t know if it’s a good or bad thing, but  after a few months of acclimatising to this, I’m not easily surprised any more. The house we visited yesterday, however, was a shock. We arrived at a dusty brick building and were presented with four flights of precarious, narrow, wooden stairs to manoeuvre to the top floor. I had to mind my head as the ceiling was very low! But we I made it unscathed. As I entered the dwelling and was invited to sit on the slightly-larger-than-a-single bed, it quickly became apparent that 4×4 metre room I was sitting in comprised the entirety of the ‘house’ this family lived in. The kitchen (a two-burner gas stove and some pots and pans) was on one wall, the bed took up another, with some shelves and a small dresser containing the family’s clothes and other possessions. The family was mum, dad, young son and daughter. They all carry slight frames and the 14-year-old daughter looks particularly malnourished. Mum and dad occupy the bed at night, the children on an uncomfortable-looking mat. A flimsy, hole-ridden tarp stopped the rain from coming into the room during summer. To add to this, one of my companions pointed out some mice frolicking freely up and down the walls and across the ceiling ledges.

I was overwhelmed and heartbroken that this beautiful family had to live like this.

Now, I am asked at every house visit to share a short message to encourage the residents. On the way there, I felt God prompting me to share about reading the Bible regularly to be equipped to fight against the Devil (the sword of the Spirit which is the word of God is given as our weapon of choice and we should wield it well – Ephesians 6:17). Upon our arrival, I thought ‘How can I share that, Lord?! Surely you have something to say about money? Maybe trusting in you? Perseverance?’

I don’t know if it was God or the echoes of Mary’s instruction, but this thought crossed my mind, reassuringly: ‘This is the message. They have all they need in Me, and this is the word for them.’

So I shared. Pity faded away as I shared passionately and honestly with my brothers and sisters in Christ. God started showing me that they were capable, hard-working believers, and it was a joy to share with them.

Afterwards, we were offered Fanta and some biscuits, which was a lovely gesture. As the conversation took a turn into Nepalese Language Land, I found myself tuning out and staring the ceiling ledge, watching the mice chase each other back and forth on the wooden frame of the building. I had never seen mice roam so freely in someone’s home! One sister caught my gaze and said that the mother of the family wished I hadn’t seen the mice. She joked that they were domesticated animals.

I replied, ‘Oh yeah? What are their names?’

As soon as this was translated to the family, it came down hard on the funny bones of the family and my companions and raucous laughter erupted! For a solid few minutes we revelled in this simple joke and took turns naming the furry residents. I don’t know what was better, sharing spiritual truths or sharing funnies, but this was visit will go down as one of my favourite times in Nepal so far.

No earth-shattering revelation or lesson from this story… except that humour is powerful and universal 🙂

‘You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.’
Psalm 16:11

Space

I dream every night here in Nepal. I don’t remember all the theories on dreams I learned in my introductory psychology courses, but one is that when we sleep, our brain sorts through and digests what we have experienced through the day. Or something like that. In any case, I dream a lot more in Nepal than I ever did in Australia, and I think it’s because I am far less busy here.

In Australia, I was involved in a lot of activities: study, work, involvement in a few assorted groups, volunteering at church and in the community in various capacities, social stuff and a heap of other things in between. I wore my business as a badge of honour. I enjoyed always having something to do and having a ‘full’ life.

However, for me, business had two downsides. First, there was a lot of anxiety that came with so many commitments. More commitments meant more deadlines, more responsibility and more expectation which often meant more worry. My mind was always cluttered and I found it difficult to concentrate with the 50 things swirling in my mind at once.

Secondly, I hated being alone. The idea of solitude actually scared me sometimes because it meant I would have to think and possibly hear from God and I was afraid of what that would mean and the challenges that could bring. It was always much easier and more enjoyable solely to verbally digest and throw around ideas with people instead; I would rarely explore my own brain. In fact, virtually the only times I was alone in Australia were in the car, the toilet and in my bed.

In Nepal, I have no job, no commitments. I take each day as it comes and do what God gives me each day, trusting that He will give me all I need to complete the work. Ministry opportunities are around every corner and there are many projects for me to complete, as well as household duties.  It’s a not busy life. But it’s a fulfilling one..

I have started to learn to overcome the issues of my past business, because God has been teaching me and because I have the time to listen to Him. In the face of my past anxiety, I now have peace each day because I know I will have enough time to do everything I need to do, and to do it well. And in the face of my fear of solitude, while it was initially difficult to be alone, I now relishit. God has spoken to me more in the last month than ever before, because I have enough space in my day to allow him to. I enjoy thinking, reflecting, mulling ideas over in my mind… it is truly wonderful to use the brain I’ve been given and explore the ideas and stimuli God has placed around me.

Now, some may caution and say I’m wearing rose-coloured glasses or scoff because I am just a youth with no real responsibilities to devote my time to, but it’s pretty clear to me that my time-spacious life at present is healthier than my former set-up, and I will aim to replicate it back home.

While I am truly in the present and living in Nepal is wonderful, I am aware that my time here is short and there is a life for me back home to prepare for. There must be lifestyle decisions made now before Australia is reality again, so the lessons I’ve learned here don’t go to waste.

I want to have only a few commitments and do them well. To work to the best of my abilities in the tasks God gives me, and not to be lorded over by the expectations of my culture or those around me. To have space to read, reflect, hear from God and invest into my relationships well. Ultimately, though, God’s the boss. If he wants me to be fully booked every day to the point of exhaustion, I will gladly do it because I know He’ll give me the strength to. But I have a hunch that this probably won’t be the case.

I am acutely aware that it will be a challenge to defy Western business norms and opt for a simpler, ‘spacier’ lifestyle. The world will tell me to load myself up with as many commitments and opportunities as I can because I only live once and if I’m not busy, I’m lazy. The world will tell me to bust my guts working because I need to earn piles of money to fuel my life. But I will do my best to swim upstream when it comes to these things, and I will trust that God will help me and provide for me. I don’t want to have to ‘make time’ for anything. I want to be wise and generous and follow God in using the time I’ve been given.

‘Show me, O Lord, my life’s end
and the number of my days;
let me know how fleeting is my life.
You have made my days a mere handbreadth;
the span of my years is nothing before you.
Each man’s life is but a breath.’
Psalm 39: 4, 5

I am Bideshi

I was on the brink of writing another ‘wealth’ post after what I saw and heard on my road trip with Reuben. I met pastors who were in great financial need, or had big dreams from God that were only hindered by a lack of money. I was going to rip everyone for being selfish and encourage people to fund God’s work in Nepal by supporting pastors here. I even had plans to work in Australia to fund and support the ministries I have come in contact with.

Then I met Mary.

Let me tell you how: A few weeks ago I met an American guy in church by the name of Bob Wesley. He is a very friendly, joyful man of God who has lived in Nepal for over 25 years. He is married to an Indian woman whom he greatly encouraged me to meet. So I went to their house today, met her and spent a few precious hours with her.

The short, kind looking woman warmly invited me into the family home, a beautiful place she lives in with Bob, two Nepali staff that aid with ministry and four street children. We sipped tea and talked food and culture and laughed a lot! Being married to an American, Mary has exceptional English skills so I found myself talking more and more passionately as time went on. Deep conversations in English are hard to come by, so I relished the opportunity to share my heart with someone. I spoke of the pastors I had met and how sad I am because of the financial poverty in Nepal. Of the anger I felt at the individualistic, material nature of my homeland. Of my plans to work hard to support the ministry in this nation.

The last week, I had been thinking about my identity as an Australian in Nepal. These musings were instigated by meeting two young American teachers who have come to work in Nepali schools for a few years. They were telling of how they have been learning Nepali and buying vegetables at the market in Nepali. They said they were now ‘not Bideshi, Nepali’. Bideshi is the Nepali word for ‘foreigner’. After lots of thought, I had come to the conclusion that for me, no matter how much Nepali food I eat or language I learn or market trips I take, I am an Australian in Nepal. I am Bideshi. I shared these thoughts with Mary, also.

Her reply will change the trajectory of my time in Nepal, and perhaps even my life. Each word came fuelled by love, covered in righteousness and laced with grace. She spoke calmly and softly words that challenged me to my very core:

Mary encouraged me in my Badeshi identity. She encouraged me to hold on to the manners and fairness I have learned in Australia and teach these to the Nepalese people.

She also challenged my thoughts on the importance of money, saying that millions of dollars poured into a corrupt nation will not change a thing. Well-intending organisations have tried and failed with money alone. Only God changing hearts will change this nation.

‘You think you can solve Nepal’s problems by working and earning a bit of money? The needs here are never ending. You will not solve the problems and then the Devil will beat you!’

‘People work so hard for food that does not last. We should work hard for what is eternal.’

‘How can we improve if we think only as the world does? If church leaders think the same as the world about money, what good is that?’

‘When a baby is born, the doctors first check that the heart is beating, not that the brain is working. The heart is what needs changing, then the brain will follow.’

‘Don’t be motivated by needs. Needs of the world are overwhelming. Instead be motivated by love and led by the Spirit.’

‘You study Human Services? Jesus died for humans, an ultimate service. You are surely in God’s business.’

‘Even more than an ambassador for Australia, you are an ambassador for Christ. You are a child of God. A citizen of Heaven. Teach the people here of that. Leave a legacy.’

I sobbed.

After a long pause, I said ‘I feel like your words are a sack of gold, and you’ve just whacked me over the head with it!’

Mary was so right. It was as though God took over her vocal chords for a while and spoke straight into my heart. I cannot express how important this conversation was.

I will not spit on the street like the Nepali. I will not unlearn that this practice spreads disease.
I am Australian, not Nepali.
I am Bideshi.

I will not litter. I will not unlearn that this practice is lazy and unsightly and smelly.
I am Australian, not Nepali.
I am Bideshi.

I will say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’, even if it’s not common practice in Nepal. I will not unlearn that this practice is polite and displays that I feel people have value.
I am Australian, not Nepali.
I am Bideshi.

I will not let money rule my thinking. God is provider and has promised life and abundance; I and the believers around me are already complete in Him.
I am a citizen of Heaven, not of this world.
I am Bideshi.

I will let the overwhelming needs of this world break my heart, but I will not be led by them. The Holy Spirit is my guide and He will lead me to the work He has for me.
I am a citizen of heaven, not of this world.
I am Bideshi.

I will teach those around me through word and deed the love and the way of Christ. I will leave a legacy of faith, not of possessions.
I am a citizen of this Heaven,
not of this world.

I am Bideshi.

‘Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.’
Matthew 6:19, 20

‘You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.’
Matthew 5: 13

‘Dear friends, I warn you as “temporary residents and foreigners” to keep away from worldly desires that wage war against your very souls.’
1 Peter 2:11

 

Surprise!

Life for me is extremely unpredictable. I often can’t even tell you what I’ll be doing in the next hour because I just don’t know! I’m becoming more and more adaptable to randomness and taking life as it comes.

Yesterday, however, was challenging. Because of a miscommunication, I was urgently reefed out of a women’s fellowship meeting just as I began a message, to do some translating work that really could’ve waited. This made me feel frustrated and alone, and was compounded with the sickness I was feeling (after my first bout of diarrhoea, lameo!), and the fact that I wanted to talk to my mum but after a few hours of trying, the internet just wouldn’t connect. So I blurted out a prayer to God – ‘I need you now!’

Literally a few minutes later, I was able to sit down with Pastor Reuben and get some clarity on the next few months’ work. I will be travelling with him to 6+ villages to meet, interview and gather paperwork on orphans, who, when the paperwork is done, will LIVE IN THE ORPHANAGE!!!! SOON!!! AHH!!!! I’m so excited! God is so good. I did not expect that I’d be able to be a house mum in the orphanage for a loooong time, but it looks like it’ll happen in May!

I’m in Nepal. I have important work here. Sure, it’s frustrating at times (I think I use that word at least 15873 times per day), but I am here for a reason, and God really does have it under control.

God reminded me of a prayer I like to pray a lot – ‘God, surprise me’. Rather than tell God what to do, in any area of life, be it stress, sickness, loss, pain, joy, anticipation, I just ask Him to come through and surprise me by working out a situation however He sees fit. I have prayed that prayer many times, and God has answered it many times in Nepal. I felt like He told me to take the random and frustrating (ah, there’s that word again!) events that happen as surprises from Him! This perspective has certainly changed how I look at things that happen!

I got to practice patience when the internet router broke and it took 2 hours of travel and 2 hours of waiting to fix. Surprise!

I get to practice improvisation and having God’s word on the tip of my tongue in a house church meeting when Rita turns to me and says ‘Share something’. Surprise!

I got to flex my musical muscles when I was handed a guitar before praise and worship and told ‘play in rhythm’ to songs I have never heard before. Surprise!

I get to meet some children that need love and care, and I get to provide that for them really soon. God has taken me on a wild ride and will continue to map out some crazy adventures for me! Surprise!

‘My frame was not hidden from you

when I was made in the secret place.

When I was woven together in the

depths of the earth,

your eyes saw my unformed body.

All the days ordained for me

were written in your book

before one of them came to be.’

Psalm 139:15, 16

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IqLp1Vb7vMc

This is a video about the work I get to do soon! Whee!!

This Friendship is going Straight to the Pool Room

I have made some wonderful new friends. Emily, Halley, Ryan and Sam are some great quality, passionate young adults from Australia who came to help Pastor Reuben with ministry stuff for two weeks before trekking for a week. I got to live, eat and journey with these four for two weeks and a day; it was a great honour. They were some of the most encouraging, inspiring, servant-hearted, kind, caring, hilarious, accepting people I have ever met in my life. In the short time I spent with them they taught me so much about friendship. It’s ridiculous!

Let me introduce my new friends:

Emily. Kind. Generous. Genuine. Problem-solver. Hilarious.

Halley. Tough. Honest. Energetic. Intelligent. Hilarous.

Ryan. Thoughtful. Loyal. Dedicated. Trustworthy. Hilarious.

Sam. Christ-like. Fun. Honourable. Vivacious. Hilarious.

Being Aussie, we shared a bit of a connection already, and I’d been to Nepal with Ryan before, but I didn’t expect I would form friendships with the others so fast and so deep! I enjoyed many belly-laughs and adventures with these four. You’ll note that all four were hilarious – that is the first thing I noticed. After spending a few weeks with the more… reserved humour of Nepali and Americans, I welcomed the pay-outs, sarcasm and painfully dry humour Aussies are so famous for and embraced some raucous, ab-working laughter.

We cooked feasts together, supported each other, drank milkshakes and hot chocolates together, went on bewildering foreign-language vegetable market adventures together, ate Vegemite on toast together, Tim Tam Slammed together, made some noise for the taxi boys together, bartered together, saw this majestic land through Aussie eyes together, told poo stories together, worshiped God together, mourned the loss of Peter Harvey together, went on YouTube odysseys together and shared openly and honestly together.

No matter how tired they were, no matter how hard the task, these four were always ready and willing to serve, boots and all. I don’t remember hearing a single complaint the whole time I was with them. They also freely accepted me for who I am and made me feel valued and loved, and there was safety and transparency in the group that I found delightful. The presence and conversation and laughter I experienced with these guys was invigorating!

I went with Rita to drop the Aussies off at the airport earlier today, and it was really hard! Normally goodbyes are pretty easy for me – I can rationalise the fact that if I want to see someone again, I can easily visit them. But I’m already legitimately missing my new friends, and that’s saying something.

Now for one of my favourite Bible passages that personifies a fantastic group of Aussies. Thank you Emily, Halley, Sam and Ryan for spurring me on in the last little while. I’m so grateful for your company and encouragement and I look forward to more adventures with you in the future! Love you long time.

‘Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honour one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervour, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.  hare with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.’

Romans 12:9 – 13